I still wake up around 3 every morning. This hardcore habit of mine has existed for at least 9 years. I’m sure it started before that but that’s the earliest my mind can currently remember. I’ve always been a late night writer but at that time I was in a relationship and the office was on the other side of the house. I’d get up in the middle of the night to write and stay there until morning. I came home one evening to a beautiful new laptop. My girlfriend at the time said she didn’t want to stifle my creativity but didn’t like rolling over and I wasn’t in bed. I was touched. She used to do things like that which reminds me that regardless of how a relationship turns out, there is always something beautiful to remember about it.
Thinking back over the years, I’ve been loved out loud with intention countless times. There is only one woman I can think of that… (thinking of nice words)…. Well let’s just say, she was Pandora’s box. Do not cast your pearls before swine. An old friend shared that with me once. It hit me way down in the jungle deep :). I met Pandora at such a pivotal point in my life there is no denying class was in session. The lessons were swift and hard. Pandora’s middle name was Karma and she cracked knuckles without remorse.
Matthew 7:6 Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you.
In the end of the relationship and verse I found both meaning and instruction. Do not give your good thing, your good love, good time, good touch to someone who will neither appreciate nor return it.
Proverbs 9:8 Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you, Reprove a wise man and he will love you.
I spent so many years of my life trying to love broken women back to life when God had already spoke against it. I am a vessel but God is the healer. It was my lesson to learn and it shall not be repeated.